How to Reduce Resistance to Change

Every day, it seems like the taken-for-granted foundations of our lives are crumbling. Sometimes, it’s a sad loss and other times it’s an opportunity for a fresh start. But the initial reaction to this persistent uncertainty—threat, fear, resistance—is pretty much a given.

The human brain strives to maximize certainty and predictability as a central driver of behavior. In the presence of ambiguity, people fill in knowledge gaps with fear. Even the smallest change can be experienced as a threat and activate the flight or flight response.

Partnering for Productivity and Positivity

How connected do you feel to other members of your team these days? If your team is working remotely, connected only by Slack and Zoom, it might be hard to sustain a sense of teamwork. Research shows that workers who have a sense of teamwork are more productive and have greater job satisfaction. But virtual Happy Hours and other "team building" efforts only go so far.

As a leader, how can you reinforce the benefits of working well together?

Book Review: Preparing Yourself for Life's Challenges

Toughness Training for Life
by James E. Loehr, The Penguin Group, 1993

I first read this book in 1993. I found it to be a useful application of methods used to train professional athletes for the rest of us. The book proposed that instead of focusing on stress reduction--which in today's world is pretty impossible--we need to focus on toughening up in order to handle more stress and be "healthier, happier, and more productive."

How to Sustain Physical, Mental and Emotional Toughness

Most of us know the importance of recovery in the physical realm. We exercise our muscles, then allow a period of recovery in order to maximize the strength gains. We expend significant energy over the course of a day and then recover by eating and sleeping. We work hard during the week and recover on the weekend by relaxing and having fun. Even if we don't always follow these principles, we know they contribute to our physical well-being.

2 Indispensable Tools for Leading in Permanent White Water

Our world has long been characterized by overstimulation, unmanageable amounts of input and demands for faster and faster action. Many of us have been chronically overwhelmed and have struggled just to keep up.

The confluence of challenges in 2020 have magnified the impact of these conditions, adding a layer of uncertainty and anxiety that can be crippling.

“Really?” you think, “What are you telling me that I don’t already know?”

How to Overpower Procrastination with Purpose

Does this sound like something you can relate to? You’ve got a project you really need to be working on. Maybe it’s filing six months of paperwork. Or learning how to use that new software you downloaded. It’s necessary but boring. Not surprisingly, you manage to find other things to occupy your time.

This next situation is even trickier. The project is important but you’ve got feelings about it. And not happy feelings.

How to Plan for an Uncertain Future

I have a confession to make. Last week, I lost patience with the stream of well-meaning and useful advice that appears digitally every single day. I was discouraged and dispirited. I really had no energy for another how-to.

The next day, feeling somewhat more grounded, I recognized the source of my discouragement: There’s no end in sight. Nothing to look forward to. It feels like we can’t influence or control anything. There’s an ongoing sense of uncertainty and a feeling of helplessness about how to influence our futures.

Leadership Potential: Do You Know It When You See It?

As a leader, you only have so much time to spend mentoring others. But it can be difficult to figure out who to invest in.

Wouldn’t it be great to have a reliable way to identify someone with leadership potential? Someone you can invest your time and expertise in with the confidence that he or she will thrive?

Well, obviously there are no guarantees. People’s lives have a way of playing out in their own way. But there are some ways to increase the odds of making a good investment.

4 Potent Strategies to Boost Teamwork

One of my clients said recently, “When I got promoted, I had no idea how much of my time would involve dealing with people. I just wanted to do the work!”

Does that sound familiar? If so, you’re not alone. Almost every leader I’ve worked with has had a similar revelation. In fact, another client had a great way of stating this: “I need to go from ‘I get it’ to ‘I get people’.”

Having the awareness is great but it doesn’t automatically translate into action. But I have good news. I’m about to share several of the most potent strategies I know to boost teamwork.

One Good Connection a Day

In this time of social distancing it’s not unusual to feel isolated and overcrowded at the same time. You might be working from home along with your partner and children, camped out in the bedroom, on a staircase landing, or in a closet. Your days are filled with back to back Zoom meetings, and your team abandoned the Zoom happy hours after the first two months because you’re desperate for some non-screen time.

But you still yearn for that sense of true connection.

This was the challenge faced by Jenna, one of my coaching clients. “I like my work and I’ve adjusting to working from home but there’s something missing,” she said. “My days are busier than ever before but I’d love to have more meaningful conversations with my co-workers.”

Can you relate to Jenna’s dilemma?

How to Have an Accountability Conversation Without Pain

This is Part Two of a piece on accountability conversations. If you haven’t read the original piece, you can find it here. You can also find a free PDF worksheet, 5 Reasons to Tackle That Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding here.

Quick recap: Many of us find oodles of ways to avoid having conversations focused on holding someone else accountable. And yet, there are so many situations that could use such a conversation:

  • Your co-worker always shows up eight minutes late for your weekly team calls. Meanwhile, the rest of you spend that time making idle chitchat.

  • Your neighbor’s dog barks all night long. Every night.

  • Your daughter leaves dishes in the sink, right after you’ve finshed the dishes.

  • Your direct report is a lovely person who just happens to have a chronic backlog of overdue assignments.

Reclaiming Our Anchors in a Time of Great Uncertainty

Resilience has long been a topic of great interest to me. I’ve studied and taught principles and practices of cultivating resilience, and attempted to apply these in my own life. I’ve also had my share of personal challenges calling for resilience, including our house burning down just days after my 35th birthday. Resilience was not initially one of my signature strengths but life has an annoying way of providing opportunities to learn what’s needed until it sticks.

 Amidst the unfolding impact of COVID-19 globally, I’ve had the privilege to coach quite a number of leaders all over North America. While the primary topic has been about leading virtual teams, our conversations have often begun by exploring how they as leaders are managing their own anxiety and uncertainty. It’s hard to be a leader to others without having a solid foundation oneself. Read more for some of the lessons and insights.

How "Microbreaks" Can Boost Productivity While You're Working from Home

We are living a “new normal”: at least 200 million people in 21 states, 47 countries and 14 cities (as of March 26, 2020) are being urged to stay home in response to COVID-19. When I first drafted this post in the fall of 2019, it was aimed at addressing challenges facing coaching clients who had recently transitioned to working from home.

The suggestions are still very relevant. But it doesn’t take account of other factors–emotional, economic, and practical–that are complicating our ability to stay productive during this time.

I hope it helps a little. See what you think.

Lose the Angst: Making Decisions with Ease

Does your current approach to decision-making cause stress and lead to procrastination, wasted time and energy? Have you tried various techniques but still haven’t got a great “formula” that works for you?

If so, you’re not alone. Some of my clients struggle with this, too, and I can totally relate. There are times when I can make life altering decisions without hesitating. Other times, I’m paralyzed with indecision for weeks about something that seems minor.

Wouldn’t it be great to know exactly what goes into making an effective decision and how to decide with ease?

How to Bring a Sparkle to Your Day

Do you drag yourself out of bed every morning, stumbling through your morning routine?

Personal confession: That’s how I’ve been feeling more often than I would like. So I went on a search for some simple practices to start my day off right. 

My goal is to start off my day with positivity and enthusiasm, handling the challenges that come my way with grace and ease.

Is that something you want, too?

Déjà vu All Over Again

Do you ever get stuck in a vicious cycle that’s not producing the results you want? I’ve been there, more often than I’d like to admit. I can be having a civil conversation with a colleague. Suddenly, we’re at odds. How did that happen…again? And how can I prevent it from happening next time? 

I don’t think I’m particularly unusual. Many of us are stuck in cycles that feel like“déjà vu all over again,” as Yogi Berra put it.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. 

Amping Up Your Inner Champion

Am I the Only One Who’s Had This Experience?

 Do you second guess yourself when you’re faced with a new challenge? 

 Have lots of ideas but hold back and then criticize yourself for your ideas and for the fact that you held back? 

 Is your inner critic ever-present no matter how politely you ask him to mind his own business?

 If you answered a resounding “yes” to any of these questions, you’re in good company. Read more to find out what to do about it.